I'm sure on...
One of my earliest slight realisations being thereof that the father figure was saying to me as a child and teen that I was 'carving in his soul' - that we were "his grief" as if "children are their parents sorrow". Misfortune right. The mind is a mirror that shows everything reversed. I was younger then ten when I realised that he had taken this on for real, but this 'feeling' of his was pre-existing my brother and me, because he told me that he pitied on the fact of not being able to live the life he wanted for having to work for his father's/family lumberyard - so I could forgive he now projected it onto others. This was and is common practice everywhere you look(ed). (See here the solution of Equal Money system, where people who become parents do not get frustrated with self any longer, to stop the passing on the sins of the fathers and the mothers!). A simple deduction also made it clear that this was a way of trying to manipulate and control us. Children see this, seeing simple, which is everything.
But I did not speak. I did not act within these specific moments. Therefore I have to correct my past time line to be able to stand up within these moments I did not at 'those times'.
When and if someone is taking the soul on for real equals invoking the soul system, reLIE and thus no self responsibility is been taken. This is what I experienced a lot as a child and a teen, that it was taken out on us, my brother and me. (I as all had taken shit in). "Someone had to take the blame". So I took the blame for all - no one seemed to have done it - as what my mother would ridicule to as "the gnomes have done it" from which I realised that someone here is not taking self responsiblity for an action. "Blame me" was not the answer - the opposite happened in reality. I made a statement of fear within "taking the blame" - it made me lame and others as me. Therfore I am responsible for (b)laming me = not being able to stand up.
[No offense here though towards my parents for I honor them deeply - I just like to realise what is going on here on Earth]
Who done it? The human mind as the mistake.
Another slight realisation as a child was that my parents were not my parents AS it were two people in grown up bodies who were here and feed me. Haha the word feed I see in a two possible explanations - to feed with food (in dutch this is clear in the word 'opvoeden' wherein the word food is to be seen) and to feed myself within my mind consciousness system.
Within not speaking or acting in these specific moments when such slight realisations come through, SUPPRESSION takes PLACE.
Inside me as me as suppression - if I picture a picture of myself at age seven I see the suppression (I called it 'bedrukte uitdrukking') in / on my face. Especially my right eye frowned = eye sight, supressing of thoughts and emotions.
That's where self forgiveness steps in - forgiving myself thoughts, feelings, emotions attached to memories, pictures, and words.
I took on the pattern of my father and I correct myself within the word BLAME and change it into SELF RESPONSIBILITY of what I experience inside and out.
I took on the pattern of my mother within carrying and caring too much and I correct myself within this into practical supporting self as others as common sense.
Aha - so this forms the suppression package we stumble around with. Just getting started to write it out. Follow me, follow you.
How we stop the abdication of self responsiblity ---
Re-education --- www.desteni.co.za
Tools on Self-realisation --- www.desteniiprocess.com
Common sense is what is best for all --- www.equalmoney.org
