"The physical - has no agenda, need to know nothing, is already in full design, and live as it breathes, as it eats, as it fucks, as it touch. The mind – has judgments, reasons, meanings, laws about everything - without actually understanding anything.”
Bernard Poolman
A year and a half ago I started working in the matrix again - after being out of the system for fifteen years - again as to gain money to survive (better:). This time to be able to pay for my Desteni 'I' Process myself in stead of paying it from 'my partner' s income, also to become equal and one as all here and so to stand up within the system. Among others I have been pushing myself this year through the point of needing to know nothing at work and seeing what is here - to work work simply with what is here. Cause it was quite peculiar ( 'pecunia' meaning money in latin) that immediately when I started working there I remarked the collisions between people thinking / wanting to know everything which in this case it was about the famous dutch international "Holiday Trades" - which to me this was obviously trivial / wordly information, then again to some carreer junkie assistents at our 'information desk service' it appeared as to be of real importance to know beforehand.
The days I assisted a collegue as me I would say: Take an inbreath, don't go into your insecurities and take your time as you look into the brochure it's simple, alphabetical, here.
I stop and do not allow myself to fear anymore to know nothing, I stop to fear of getting fired, I stop to fear my honesty button being pushed, I stop fear me as others not understanding how to give people their (holiday country) information through being here in breath as equal as all. I know now that I did not recollect a thing then, and now still being able to assist people with what is necessary through working together with what is here. I stop fearing reactions.
At yesterday's job in a 7 store trademart - I had to stand at a gate for a ten hours shift checking people for valid entrance cards. I made a few system failures, stopped my thoughts / fears about that, trained 4 count 4 breath, my feet pushed into the ground / grounding in the physical and nothing unpleasant happened..
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be afraid of being fired by stating needing to know nothing.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be afraid of being disregarded by not wanting to know the stuff at work.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to force my partner to know something.
I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to be seen as stupid and therefor hiding myself in knowing the right stuff.
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Research material --- www.desteni.co.za
Be self honesty, be simple, breath, become earth..................
